[ gil will find that oushi had beaten him to the kitchen, but not by much. just enough time to prepare a small snack, which becomes obvious as gil draws closer to where oushi has seated himself along the large island in the middle of the industrial-sized kitchen.
it's a bowl of nuts. ]
Hey. Thanks for coming.
[ he spares a moment to look the other man over, noting the general disarray, the dark circles. he nudges the bowl a little closer towards the other. there's... Things to talk about. but first thing's first— ]
[The word dies on Gilbert’s lips, his eyes landing on the bowl of nuts. His normally pale cheeks pink and there’s a warmth in his chest that spills into his voice.]
Thank you. [Even if he wanted to deny he was hungry, his stomach growls loud and merciless. He shrinks in embarrassment, but he’s still smiling and sits across from him. Oushi thought of him. A few nuts are shyly accepted and he asks again when he’s finished with them.]
[ he's glad gil eats. it gives oushi some time to consider his words, even though technically he's had all this time to think them over... no amount of reworking the words ever seem to make them sound quite right, but he figures that's less to do with his own inadequacy and more, perhaps, to do with the strangeness of the situation itself.
at least he hopes so, anyway.
eventually, he just plows right on along, hoping his honesty might make up for the lack of grace. ]
Yeah, I'm fine. I just wanted to be the one to tell you — in case you haven't already figured it out by now... You know about the imprinting thing here, right?
[ he draws in a breath, snatches up a single nut from the bowl and works it between his thumb and pointer finger again and again and again. ]
I think we're that. It. Imprinted.
[ he looks from the nut, to the bowl, to gil himself. trying to gauge the other's reaction. ]
Sorry. I think it happened before anyone of us even knew what it was really about, or how to do it properly, and... I mean I think they're still trying to figure it all what. What it can do. How to undo it.
[ he shrugs, feeling like he's just rambling now. ]
[The stretch of silence worries Gil more. Is Oushi going to say something troubling? Is he really not okay? Then Oushi mentions imprinting and Gil finds he is slow to respond.]
...Yes. I know about it.
[He's done a few paid exercises, even with his misgivings. Normally, he'd want to gently chastise Oushi not to play with his food. But he doesn't need to hear that from him, does he?]
We... Oh. [His head is cradled in his hand.] That certainly explains a lot.
[How could he have missed it? He really is an idiot. But Oushi's apology worries him and he lifts his head to look at him.]
You needn't apologize! I-- I think I'd like to talk to you even if we hadn't imprinted, but I'm also sorry that you imprinted with me of all people! Please forgive me. It must have been hard. I'm not sure what to think.
[ in... retrospect, it's probably not the worst news gil has ever heard. (though, to be honest, oushi sort of gets the feeling any news is terrible news for gil—) in the grand scheme of things, certainly, there are worse fates to be delivered, and even worse people to be unwittingly paired with.
oushi doesn't even really know how much of gil's autonomy he values, or if the man even thinks he has any at all, but it still felt like the right thing to do in telling him. nobody should have to be saddled with a connection they never signed up for. ]
I'm fine.
[ he shrugs. that's just the truth of it, to be honest. gil isn't a bad guy, and oushi is pragmatic enough to recognize that imprinting does have its benefits. it doesn't make him want to go around imprinting with just anybody, after all, but even if his and gil's had been accidental, he finds it's not something he is all that upset by. ]
I don't dislike you, [ he thinks to clarify. somehow, gil's blatant self-deprecation makes it easier to admit such things out loud. oushi doesn't even feel all that embarrassed for it, which is a feat. ]
It just... y'know. Sucked that it happened without our consent.
[He feels deceived in a way. Maybe Patho-Gen really didn’t understand the full implications of what imprinting did, but they were willing to use them anyway. They claimed it was to save other worlds including Gil’s, but could he really trust that?
His neck aches where the device was implanted, palm falling over it. When he thinks too hard about what else might happen because Patho-Gen didn’t know, he feels lost, like he’s being dragged into the dark. It scares him when he thinks too hard about it.]
But I give you my word that I will never allow anything or anyone to control me into doing anything that goes against what is important to me. I already made my choice. I won’t allow anyone to undo that.
[Maybe that came out of nowhere now that he thinks about it, but he felt it needed to be said. He looks like he wants to say something else and adds.]
It sucks how it happened, but I’m grateful you helped me when we met. And I’m glad we’ve continued to talk since then. I don’t trust Patho-Gen, but I trust you.
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no subject
it's a bowl of nuts. ]
Hey. Thanks for coming.
[ he spares a moment to look the other man over, noting the general disarray, the dark circles. he nudges the bowl a little closer towards the other. there's... Things to talk about. but first thing's first— ]
...Hungry?
no subject
[The word dies on Gilbert’s lips, his eyes landing on the bowl of nuts. His normally pale cheeks pink and there’s a warmth in his chest that spills into his voice.]
Thank you. [Even if he wanted to deny he was hungry, his stomach growls loud and merciless. He shrinks in embarrassment, but he’s still smiling and sits across from him. Oushi thought of him. A few nuts are shyly accepted and he asks again when he’s finished with them.]
Are you okay?
no subject
at least he hopes so, anyway.
eventually, he just plows right on along, hoping his honesty might make up for the lack of grace. ]
Yeah, I'm fine. I just wanted to be the one to tell you — in case you haven't already figured it out by now... You know about the imprinting thing here, right?
[ he draws in a breath, snatches up a single nut from the bowl and works it between his thumb and pointer finger again and again and again. ]
I think we're that. It. Imprinted.
[ he looks from the nut, to the bowl, to gil himself. trying to gauge the other's reaction. ]
Sorry. I think it happened before anyone of us even knew what it was really about, or how to do it properly, and... I mean I think they're still trying to figure it all what. What it can do. How to undo it.
[ he shrugs, feeling like he's just rambling now. ]
Sorry.
[ now he's the one constantly apologizing. ]
no subject
...Yes. I know about it.
[He's done a few paid exercises, even with his misgivings. Normally, he'd want to gently chastise Oushi not to play with his food. But he doesn't need to hear that from him, does he?]
We... Oh. [His head is cradled in his hand.] That certainly explains a lot.
[How could he have missed it? He really is an idiot. But Oushi's apology worries him and he lifts his head to look at him.]
You needn't apologize! I-- I think I'd like to talk to you even if we hadn't imprinted, but I'm also sorry that you imprinted with me of all people! Please forgive me. It must have been hard. I'm not sure what to think.
no subject
oushi doesn't even really know how much of gil's autonomy he values, or if the man even thinks he has any at all, but it still felt like the right thing to do in telling him. nobody should have to be saddled with a connection they never signed up for. ]
I'm fine.
[ he shrugs. that's just the truth of it, to be honest. gil isn't a bad guy, and oushi is pragmatic enough to recognize that imprinting does have its benefits. it doesn't make him want to go around imprinting with just anybody, after all, but even if his and gil's had been accidental, he finds it's not something he is all that upset by. ]
I don't dislike you, [ he thinks to clarify. somehow, gil's blatant self-deprecation makes it easier to admit such things out loud. oushi doesn't even feel all that embarrassed for it, which is a feat. ]
It just... y'know. Sucked that it happened without our consent.
[ that stuff is! important!! ... right? ]
no subject
[He feels deceived in a way. Maybe Patho-Gen really didn’t understand the full implications of what imprinting did, but they were willing to use them anyway. They claimed it was to save other worlds including Gil’s, but could he really trust that?
His neck aches where the device was implanted, palm falling over it. When he thinks too hard about what else might happen because Patho-Gen didn’t know, he feels lost, like he’s being dragged into the dark. It scares him when he thinks too hard about it.]
But I give you my word that I will never allow anything or anyone to control me into doing anything that goes against what is important to me. I already made my choice. I won’t allow anyone to undo that.
[Maybe that came out of nowhere now that he thinks about it, but he felt it needed to be said. He looks like he wants to say something else and adds.]
It sucks how it happened, but I’m grateful you helped me when we met. And I’m glad we’ve continued to talk since then. I don’t trust Patho-Gen, but I trust you.